unhappy

Unhappy..
Exhausted..

I had finished my internship about 2 wks ago. It was a huge relief. Initially i was retained as a medical officer in emergency department.However my husband and myself thought that shift system doesnt really works for us. If i choose to stay in a&e i have to work in shift. Thus my husband called the office and asked to put my name in medical department. I was quite happy when i received a letter saying that i am a medical officer in medical department. At least i will have my weekends off and got to celebrate this raya with my precious. However a wk passed.. I am so unhappy... I am exhausted.. I am tired with the unnecessary rules. I am fed up with everything.
Its hard to see my smiles this past few days..
Its hard for me to laugh even the joke is really funny..
Its hard for me to get up early in d morning to go to work..
Its easy for me to shed my tears..
Its easy for me to become irritable...

Perhaps its hormonal..perhaps..
I dont know..
But i am unhappy.
I am usually good with my pts. But my communication skills seem disappeared like a blink of eyes..
I m no wonder a fav dr for my pt...
i used to be good but where i am at the moment?where?
I should have stayed...
My life in emergency department way better..
I have a good relationship with d specialist in etd.
I know what i should do in etd.
I love the adrenaline rush u would feel when u r looking after a pt in red zone. The moment u heard 4 bells ringing,-aah the feeling is so undescribable..
I enjoyed working in etd with those medical assistants and nurses.
I miss emergency trauma department...
How i wish i can turn back on the time....How i wish..

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