I was walking down the corridor to the outpatient clinic today when suddenly a thought of "do u really want to become a doctor aina?", strike me...
Brian was asking me a kinda similar question 2 weeks ago,
"do u always want to be a doctor aina?"
The answer is of course nooooo. I never imagined myself being a doctor. I always imagine myself being a successful businesswoman wearing those executive suits and sitting down in my own large suite waiting for my secretary to make me a cup of coffee.. I always want to be a businesswoman handling multinational company..
but its only a dream.. A dream that i dont think will ever become true...
Instead of dealing with lots of money, im dealing with the pus, faeces, blood, urine etc..And instead of sitting in a cosy chair, i will have to sit with sick people who are coughing up blood, sputum, viruses, bacteria bla bla bla..Instead of having a nice cup of coffee in my own office, i will have a cup of coffee in a run to see a patient.. Instead of having a decent lunch/dinner in a 5 stars hotel, i will have a sandwich as my lunch and maybe an apple as my dinner..Is that what i really want?
I dont know..
The other downside of being a doctor is that u know too much about certain disease/condition that u might have it in the future..or maybe now..we dont really know kan?Any1 has watched the latest episode of Greys Anatomy?Izi was diagnosed with Stage 4 malignant melanoma mets to the brain..and she was refusing treatment at the beginning. She said that she knw too much..She knw that the prognosis is poor so she was refusing a treatment..yelah kan dh tau prognosis dh poor dari buat surgery buang mets yang x tentu success lagi baek die abiskan masa die with loved ones travelling sume kan?lagipon nanti klau undergo chemo and radiotherapy banyak lak side effects..hahahaa...this is a pessimist talking..hahaahhahaa..:P..
hmm nyway back to reality..ive sent my fyp..its done.now all i have to do is fokus on my interview next week and my exams in a 4 week time.sounds scary huh?
P/s : owh nope...im not complaining..neither am whining..hehe.i just wrote what i feel like..hahaha